The Van De Van Theatre of the Air Presents:

Petered Out

Scene III

the scene:   In the African Jungle.  Noon.  Chattering of monkeys.  Calls of exotic birds.  Enter, from left, Talpo.  Simultaneously, from right, enter Jungawa Bill.  They don't see each other.  They go across the stage and look off-stage whence the other one had come.  Turn and see each other.  Nod of approval.  Both clasp hands behind their backs and circle, looking each other over.  Stop, Talpo stage right, Jungawa Bill stage left.  Move to center stage; sit back to back, Talpo facing stage right.  They stay thus. 
Talpo: I haven't seen you in quite a while, Talpo.
Jungawa Bill: Nor I you, Jungawa bill.
Talpo: Well met are we indeed today.
Jungawa Bill: Quite true, Jungawa Bill.
Talpo: Wait a minute, Talpo.  Aren't you Jungawa Bill?
Jungawa Bill: I - Jungawa Bill?
Talpo: Yes, and I Talpo.
Jungawa Bill: Just wait a minute.  I must think this out.  You say I am Jungawa Bill?  And that you are Talpo?
Talpo: Exactly.  Somewhat disconcerting, eh?
Jungawa Bill: To say the least.  It does seem possible to me that I am Jungawa Bill.  After all, here are his shovel and rake (producing them).  Well, we've proved that I'm Jungawa Bill, but how to prove that you're not, and that you are, indeed, Talpo?
Talpo: Quite simple.  Here is Talpo's rock (producing it from behind the two, where it previously wasn't).  I guess I must be Talpo.
Jungawa Bill: I haven't seen you in quite a while, Talpo.
Talpo: Nor I you, Jungawa Bill.
Jungawa Bill: Then, shall we turn around and remedy that?
Talpo: I feel sure that we shall do so eventually.  It may as well be now.
Jungawa Bill: Exactly my thought, let's do it.
Talpo: Wait!  (a beat)  What if we're not really who we have just decided we are?  Think how disappointed we will be when we turn around and don't see each other.
Jungawa Bill: We needn't worry about that, I think.  Didn't we just prove who we are?  After all, I have Jungawa Bill's rake and shovel  (feeling his shoulders)  and now I find that I even have his cloak.  I must be he, just as you must be Talpo, as you have his rock - and probably his cape as well, if I don't miss my guess.  How could we be anyone else?
Talpo feels his shoulders, finds the cape.  Shudders
Talpo: Well, you're right about the cape, but that furthers my doubt.  Had I not had Talpo's cape, I would have been at ease, for Talpo is often a forgetful person who might easily have lost his cape.
Jungawa Bill: Then you should be glad that you have it, Talpo.
Talpo: Shhh!  Don't call me Talpo.  It makes me feel guilty.
Jungawa Bill: Guilty?  Guilty about what?
Talpo: Why, about the theft, of course.
Jungawa Bill: Theft?  Have we been robbed?  What did they get...?
Talpo: No, no, I mean a theft we committed.
Jungawa Bill: I'm afraid I don't remember it.  (looks about nervously)
Talpo: Nor do I, that's why I'm afraid.
Jungawa Bill: If you don't remember a theft, why would you be afraid?
Talpo: I'm afraid that we may have stolen these things from Talpo and Jungawa Bill
Jungawa Bill: That's not possible. 
To take these things from those two, we would have had to kill them.
Talpo: Exactly.
Jungawa Bill: I see what you're afraid of.
  They sit, staring off stage.  Talpo fondles his rock.  Jungawa Bill plays with his shovel and rake.  Jungle noises. 
    Silence.  They sit perfectly still. 
  A trumpet, as of a bull elephant.  They leap up.  Run past each other to look off stage where the other had been looking.  Relax.  Look smilingly at each other and join hands.
Talpo: It appears we aren't to be disappointed today.
Jungawa Bill: Still ... I'm not certain.  But we must be Talpo and Jungawa Bill.  For if we aren't, no one will be.
Talpo: If we weren't them to begin with, weren't we someone else?
Jungawa Bill: Of course .... Wait, what will happen to the old us-es?
Talpo: Don't worry, Jungawa Bill, I have that figured out already.  We don't have anything which belonged to our former selves, do we?
Jungawa Bill: No, we don't, but ....
Talpo: If we don't have it, then someone else must have it.  They can be us while we are Jungawa Bill and Talpo.  Who knows, this may not last very long.  Who knows who we will be tomorrow?
Jungawa Bill: The name, the face, even the thoughts may be different, but we'll still be the same person.
Talpo: True.  (pause)  Now that we're us, what do we do?
Jungawa Bill: We do as we always have.
Talpo: But what's that?
Jungawa Bill: Must you always ask stupid, pointless questions?
  Talpo looks ashamed and sits down, cross-legged with the rock between him and Jungawa Bill.
Talpo: Why are you always so mean?
Jungawa Bill: Why indeed?  But then, one changes so slowly, and so seldom.
Talpo: True. 
(several beats) 
Look out, Jungawa Bill!
  Talpo leaps on Jungawa Bill and begins to hit him in the head with the rock.  Jungawa Bill struggles for two blows, then lies still. 
  Darkness.  Talpo laughs maniacally: it reverberates throughout.  Loud splash and monkey chattering. 
  Silence. 
  Lights come up so slowly as to be imperceptible. 
  Jungawa Bill is standing over Talpo who is on his knees facing stage left.  Talpo has the rock raised over his head, ready for another blow.
Jungawa Bill: If you're finished, Talpo, we can go now.
Talpo: I suppose I'm finished.
Jungawa Bill: Good.  Let's go.  (they don't move)
  Darkness, Monkeys chatter, Birds caw.  Long roar from far off. 
Pause. 
  Lowing of a cow nearby.  The star shines again.
- CURTAIN -
 copyright by Charlie Van Becelaere, administered by Grand Teuton Press, all rights reserved 
 
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